matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
