so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
