can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
