12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
