therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I got inside last night via doggy door
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
