I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
