he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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