I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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