Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
