I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
