You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
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