She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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