quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
