Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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