In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
