Where are you?
In a non slutty way
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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