Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
