Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
