East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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