Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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