i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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