In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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