I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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