Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
