going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
