Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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