do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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