i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
