please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
