And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
