im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
