i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
