I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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