Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize