Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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