I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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