I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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