the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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