if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
