U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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