Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
