I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
