So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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