I didn't shave. On purpose
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
