My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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