There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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