those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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