piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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