The brown eye won't let me do that either.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
third nipple confirmed
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I just had sex on a roof
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize