I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize