Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
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