he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
