I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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